Here I am...in a very interesting city, halfway across the globe and all I can think of is home. I realized today that I am a homebody. I really want my couch, my bed, my apartment. I am perfectly happy in Dallas Texas going about my day to day life.
From today - July 7th, 2010 to last year July 7th 2009 my life has changed dramatically. This time last year I was set to marry someone in October. That didn't happen. He is now married to someone else and I hope (sincerely) that he is very happy with her. I, myself, was with someone different not long after the engagement broke off. It was a brief but meaningful spark wherein I learned a lot about myself. I was hoping for a great romance. It wasn't there.
What I have realized is that here are some people for which you should risk everything. It took me a long, long time to realize this fact. After losing my mother I never wanted to let anyone have my heart or feelings in a way that could every hurt me so badly. But living that way is no way to live.
There are some people that won't give up on you. No matter how much you push them away, no matter how much you hurt them or they hurt you...there is that person out there who doesn't give up because their love for you is so great. And because that love is so great you can find your way through all the bad times to a much better place...to a place where there is only love.
What I always wanted was to be with the person who couldn't stand to be without me. Because it would mean that it was ME he wanted to be with, not just some girl who fit the bill. And finally, finally, finally, he's there - after 10 years of trial and tribulation - we have made it through all the BS...and I'm glad we both realized it before it was too late.
To the one who never gave up on me - and who felt as lonely without me as I did without him: I love you. And thanks for making our moments together funny and special. You make me laugh and that's my favorite thing to do...
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