State Fair Chili Cook-off Part 1: Preparation

I've decided to compete in this years chili cook off! Very exciting!

I head to Wal-Mart to get some items for Sunday's event. Namely, fuel for my Coleman pump stove (on loan from one of my assistants, Pablo).

I'm on a mission for fuel but I'm immediately distracted by Halloween items. Ooooh! Dog Costumes. I need a costume for Beans MF anyway.



I liked the hot dog but its too obvious so I went with the pumpkin. He's going to love it!

Ok so fuel. Camping supplies here I come. Uh oh. Kitchen Gadget aisle is distracting me. I think I need something on this aisle to help with the chili.



I grab a measuring cup/spoon set that is only .88 cents! Ok now on to sporting goods.

Oh wait! I want this vacuum:





But not today because it's $500.

Luckily the lady just announced something about sporting goods on the intercom so I'm reminded of my fuel. Here's the stove I'm using:




But I don't see any fuel!!! Ugh!!!

Ok so I located the fuel. It was conveniently next to the stove.





Yes I just had a blonde moment. I thought that thing on the front of the stove was what the fuel came in but turns out that's just the tank. I'm dumb. :(

Ok so how long does one gallon of fuel last? Hm. I better get two since I'm doing a test run on my chili recipe tonight.

I have to make a quick call to see if I have a folding table at home. I really want to buy this Coleman pop up kitchen but it's $42.00. Hm. I'll pass this time. But if I win then I'm coming back to get it.

Now I need team shirts. I like purple so that's the one I pick. I've been here over an hour and haven't gotten food yet. I need mascara. I've been wanting to try the new one JLo has been advertising but I can't remember the name so I get my trusty lash blast**







Ok - Finally on to the groceries! I really just need meat and a couple of spices I'm low on at home.

2 hours later here's my basket:




I'm forgetting something. I just know it. I'm tired too. And hungry. Time to go.

Check out was quick. Now I'm on my way home to fire up the stove and give it a test run! More to come!

**ladies, I have tried EVERY mascara out there - expensive and cheap. This one is the best, I swear.

The Elements of F*cking Style

Not too long ago, my half-brother belittled my blog and writing skills in general.  I actually considered his criticism for a brief moment and didn't think about it again until I ran across this little gem:

I immediately ordered it thinking that if my skills needed some improvement, this was the book to do it.  I have to say, it is pretty awesome so far.  How could I not like a book that advises me to:
"Use strong, definite language in your writing.  Make that sentence your bitch."   

It also gives examples of words that are commonly used in error, proper comma placement, semi-colons and hyphens. PLUS its MUCH more interesting than the original Elements of Style.  Strunk and White could put a corpse to sleep.  Apparently I am a moron because I thought you had to put a comma before you called someone Jr. or Sr.  The book literally says people who do this are idiots.  Guilty.

Expect better writing from here forward, people!

(SIDENOTE...Per this book, Its perfectly acceptable to refer to those who would belittle my blog and/or writing an: ass hole, ass-hole or asshole - although the latter is the preferred form.)

Back to School

I don't have children of my own (save my pugs of course) but today I am reminded of the first day of school by many of my facebook friends.  Seems everyone is posting pictures of their children along with tearful words of nostalgia for the days before he/she was "all grown up."  I'm sure if my dad were a facebook user he might have similar sentiments on this day.  Thank God he hates computers and spends more time cussing their existence than actually working on one.

Anyway, I learned recently that one Dallas school has IPad stations for their Kindergartners.  Ok I don't even own an IPad.  WTF? 

Knowing this, I have to wonder if kids these days are filled with as much trepidation about the first day of school as many of us were before the days of technology filled classrooms.

I woke up early for the first day of school.  My outfit was already picked out my my mom.  The year was 1980 something so who knows what kind of exotic clothing choice I was sporting that day.  I'm sure there is a picture or two somewhere.  I can't tell you what I ate for breakfast but I can tell you that I was excited about having school supplies.  This quirk of mine would carry on into my college years.  I love school supply shopping.  Something about notebooks and pencils makes me feel like I'm about to accomplish something great.

I remember clearly my mother walking me to the door of Mrs. Blaylock's Kindergarten class.  I was nervous but not crying.  Looking back I wonder why?  In a town of only 5000 people, I had encountered most kids before that day.  I think my mom put me in every Vacation Bible School there was the summer before - regardless of denomination (this could explain some of my issues with organized religion but that is a whole other topic).  Upon entering the classroom I immediately recognized some of the faces.  Suzie Allen was one; as well as James Stevenson - two people I would eventually go on to graduate high school with 12 years later. 

Then there was this one girl... I didn't know her name when I walked in the door but I noticed her immediately.  She was crying.  And by crying I mean bawling.  And by bawling I mean her face was red with tears streaming down it like her life was over.  I mean, quite literally, like coming to school that day was the worst thing that had ever happened to her, EVER.  Heck, maybe it was the worst thing she had ever encountered in the whopping 5 years she had been alive.  Who knows?  I knew this much - I wanted nothing to do with her.  Her crying was contagious.  The girl next to her caught it and started with the tears streaming down her face too.  A few other kids were beginning to sniffle.  This was awful.  I told my mom "bye" and tried to snag a seat near some people I recognized in the corner of the room.  Bad news for me, the teacher was putting us in alphabetical order and I got stuck right next to red-faced crying girl.  She cried ALL DAY LONG in some form or fashion.  Sometimes quite hiccuping other times full on hissy fit.  I found out her name was Stephanie and tried to show her my cool school supplies.  She was not interested.  Any time the teacher offered up a chance to go somewhere or do something I was out of my seat ASAP just to get a break from this chick.  

When my mom picked me up later asking about how my day was, I was not that pleased.  I voiced some complaints about Stephanie and her crying.  My mom's reaction was basically "deal with it, Lesley."  

Turns out this Stephanie girl lived not far away in my neighborhood so we ended up being friends for a while until she stole my boyfriend and pushed me on the playground.  Then we were NOT friends and I hated her guts and thought she deserved to have a terrible first day of school for being such an awful person.  She moved away a couple of years later.

Hm, come to think of it - maybe we would have done better with IPad stations. 

Project Pugway - August 27th, 2011 - 11-2 pm

Time for DFW Pug Rescue's Project Pugway!

I'm very excited to be a part of this event.  We will have a few local celeb's participating as well as a bake sale and silent auction - all benefiting pug rescue.  This organization is committed to taking in every pug - regardless of health issues or age.  Their mission is "No Pug Left Behind."  I have been a fan of this breed since I was a little girl and my parents bought me my first pug, Violet.   They're such fun, comical dogs.  Jacob and I laugh at ours pretty much every day.

This is not a pug exclusive event.  All dogs are welcome (on a leash of course).  I'm thinking Cactus Jack and Beans MF are going to be modeled by Jacob - although he doesn't know it yet.  Come out,  have a good time and support the pugs!  I hope to see you there!

For more info on Pugs and a history of the breed, check out the featured article by City +Country Pets  

http://ccpets.com/magazine/2011/08/C&C_Pets_08_2011.pdf